More follicle checks

Ok I had a lot of visits that were pretty much the same. We went in Thursday (the 6th), Saturday, Monday, Wednesday, and Friday. The follicle that was 15 stayed at 15 except on Sat. It shrank a little. Finally on Wednesday it grew to 16 (which the nurse told me on Tues that if it was at 16 when I come back in we would go ahead and do the hcg shot). So I was really happy to see it at first. Well then there was another guy around 13mm so the nurse who was doing the u/s said we could go ahead and do the hcg shot or do two more days of shots and let the second guy catch up. I had two vials of medicine left so we thought it would be good to use them up and having two follicles are better than one. All together I did 12 days of shots. Friday we went in and the 16mm one grew to 19x22! But we couldn't find the other one. So they gave me the hcg shot and we scheduled the IUI. We were pretty excited! Saturday at 8am we went in to give them Joshua's guys so they could run tests. Finally 45 mins later they took us back. We got Joshua's results and his count is at 23 million and mobility is at 87%. All of that is really good! So we did the IUI. I didn't feel a thing, it was great! So now we wait to test. I will post in my blog if I am pregnant after I tell all of our families. We can't wait!!

Father's Day was great! We had already bought him a workbench so he can start with woodworking. But Sunday morning I surprised him with a new drill. He loves it! It's going to be nice to build things exactly how I want them.

Saturday we are headed to Ohio for the week to look at houses. Then the 30th I am going to see NKOTB in St. Louis with Tracey! I'm very excited!  

Follicle Check!

We had an appointment today at 9:15. I had an u/s done to check the follicles in the ovaries. Left one was up first! There are two in there that are around 9mm each. The right one is doing real well. One of the follicles is 15mm!! If it was 16 we would've done the trigger shot and the IUI tomorrow. But it's not so we have to wait. I can't remember the other one's size. She gave me two choices. I could not do the shots of Brevelle and let them try to grow on their own and go back on Thursday to check or take a vial today, tomorrow, and Wednesday and go in on Thursday to check. They should go up 1 or 2mm in size everyday on their own but since I have leftover shots from a year ago and they haven't expired we decided I do the shots. We are pretty excited. Looking back at last year's post, the follicles are growing much better on just taking the pills! Woohoo! Well until the next visit :) Goodnight!!

Hysteroscopy

Today I had a hysteroscopy done. I really love the staff at my doctor's office, they are great! For a hysteroscopy they put a camera in you to look at your uterus. I didn't feel it inside me at all. We were even watching it on the screen which I thought was gross but Joshua thought it was pretty cool. Dr. Thompson was making sure Joshua wasn't getting squeamish and we told him he watched the delivery so this was nothing! He found some plaque on my uterine wall which was probably from the placenta so he just scraped it off. I didn't feel that either but watching it was so weird, he just kept poking at it until it was all gone. Everything else looks great and I go back on Monday to get an ultrasound done to check for follicles and hopefully get a refresher course for the injections. We are getting excited. Right now I am on letrozol pills for ovulation and I take 5mg a day until Sunday. Well that is all for right now. When Joshua uploads pictures from our camera I will post the ones we took over memorial weekend when we went to Phoenix to celebrate his sister-in-law's birthday. We had a blast!! Thank you all for your prayers, we really appreciate them! 

Mom's visit and more

My mom came to visit us on the 23rd til the 30th. The first night she was here we played Bunco with the Kirtland Spouse Club. It was so much fun and I won the most buncos! I got a $50 gift card to The Elephant Bar. We also worked on Joy's room to put up some clothes in bins and separate neutral clothes from the girly ones in case our next baby is a boy. Kind of exciting that we won't be finding out the sex! Friday night we went to Girl's Night Out at Hard Rock Casino and Hotel. That was a lot of fun! We got two massages, a 10 minute relaxation, and some tinsel in our hair (which is still in mine). Also mom got my Mother's Day gift, an Orgami Owl necklace with a purple heart, a wing, and a J will be coming later. I have been wanting one so I am very excited she got one for me! Saturday Joshua and I went to a Renaissance Fair while mom stayed home. It was fun to see.

One of the neat pictures that Joshua took.





Mom left on Tues and we had a great visit with her. Yesterday I went to PWOC (Protestant Woman Of the Chapel). It was awesome to see everyone. Have I mentioned that we have a great support system here? Because we do!!

Joshua and I have started Couch to 5k. I have been wanting to be able to run so we are finally doing it. Last night was week 1 day 1. I thought I wasn't going to make it. But he motivated me (more like yelling, haha) and I did not stop running when I had to run. Luckily right now you only run for 60 seconds but it's the longest 60 seconds!

As promised here are pictures of Joy! She is so beautiful and I am so lucky to have these pictures.

She had so much hair!

The hospital had this ring and gave it to us after they were done.

 

In fertility news I started my second month of birth control today, so at the end of this month I get to schedule my hysteroscopy and start my ovulation pills.

 

 

Until next time :)

Heartbreaking

I can't believe I haven't gotten on here since May. It's just easier to update on Facebook. Everyone pretty much knows we got pregnant. I had the most wonderful pregnancy. But sadly we lost Joy Annette by a cord accident at 40 weeks and 3 days on Feb 11th.

We were so blessed to even get pregnant so I never complained or took advantage. I enjoyed the time I had with Joy. I miss feeling her kick and dance. And oh man was she beautiful. I will be posting pictures of her on here soon. But for now I have a picture of her footprint on my sister's necklace.

We are seeing a fertility dr again so we can get pregnant before we move to Ohio. I saw him on April 4th and he did an ultrasound on me to see what the next step would be. He found some tissue still in my uterus (we saw it too!) so he put me on birth control for 2 months so I can flush it out. When my second period starts I call to schedule a hysteroscopy. I can also start my ovulation medicine then too and hopefully do another IUI. We are excited we can move forward in the right direction.

I was told I won't lose another baby that way again. I will be watched very carefully my next pregnancy for my sanity. I would go to the dr everyday if I could. Also I was told they will take him or her out right when she or he is ready. If that means a c-section, I am ok with that. If I have to get induced and deliver, bring it on. I did exceptionally well even knowing the outcome.

I hurt everyday bc I don't have her with me, but we can't change what happened. I just have to put all my trust in God.

We also have been blessed with the people around us. Both our families got to come to her Memorial, which her Memorial was so beautiful. Joshua found a song that is now her anthem, called One More Day by Rocket Club. The video on youtube is incredible.

I wish everyone could've met Joy but we all will again one day and that brings me peace. Also knowing that Memaw and everyone that we have loved and lost are up there loving on her helps me so much.

I want to say thank you for all the kind words our friends have sent us, the flowers and plants are beautiful, and the dinners that were provided for us were amazing. We knew we liked it here but now we absolutely love it and our friends here. THANK YOU!!!!

I am pretty sure I have said this before, I am not a good writer. I have so much to say so I am all over the place. I apologize. I am hoping to keep up to date with our journey on here. I won't be very public on Facebook but you will be able to read everything on here. Thanx for reading!

A pretty long update

So sorry I haven't updated. We started a new cycle in the middle of February and I learned how to give myself shots. But I didn't get to finish b/c we left for FL on March 7th. So that cycle was another bust!! So to recap I still haven't been able to grow an egg :( It has been pretty frustrating but life happens and I have had that trip planned since the Summer. He was only with me in FL for a week and I stayed for 5 more weeks.

We took a nice trip to Universal Studios, Islands Of Adventure, and Sea World. It was so much fun and definitely a much needed vacation.

Love the shirts we got!!

I spent the rest of my time in Florida visiting my older sister and nieces and getting ready for my 3rd niece to be born (I better have a boy!!), going to the beach, going out dancing, and getting sick :(. My younger sister wasn't due til April 5th but she had Addison (Addie) early on March 31st at 11:24pm. Here are some more pics:

My mom Krissy, my twin Tracey, me, and my younger sister Shana (can't even tell she is pregnant!)

Addie with full head of hair and highlights!!

My oldest nieces Kierstynn and Cera

So I got back to ABQ on April 18th. I loved being with my family but I was so glad to be back home with Joshua (and I'm sure he was glad to have me back!). I called the dr the next day to start a new cycle and even though I took a pregnancy test the day before and got a negative I still had to go in to get a blood test so I could start progesterone. Of course it was negative and I got to start the pills. When my cycle finally started, on day 5 I started the Femara pills through day 9. I went in for an ultrasound and my eggs didn't grow so I had to give myself Brevelle shots. They told me to do a vial that day and another vial on Sat then go in on Sunday (Mother's Day) for another ultrasound to check the girls (ovaries) and see if they have grown some eggs. The shots aren't bad at all. The hardest part is getting the medicine in the shot w/out bubbles. Bubbles aren't bad but you want to get all the medicine you can. So on Sunday Joshua finally went w/ me to the dr. Of course he still doesn't know what he was looking at on the ultrasound, lol. But there was an egg that was about 12x12. The dr told me he wanted atleast one egg 17x17 or 18x18. So it's progress! We talked about doing IUI and decided to do that when it was time. I was told to take half a vial that day and come back on Tuesday afternoon for another ultrasound check. Tuesday the egg in the left ovary was 16x12. The right one was being very shy. Oh was that painful!! But there weren't any big ones in her anyway. So to keep the one in the left growing I was told to take another half on Tues and then another half on Wed then come in early Thursday. Which I got great news! The egg was 20x17!! So I got my HCG shot (trigger shot) to help with the ovulation and made an appointment for Friday afternoon for the IUI. We have been so excited! So last Friday we did the IUI. Joshua had to give them a sample of the guys and they tested it before we did it. I have been really nervous that both of us could be a problem. Well, I had nothing at all to worry about! His sperm count was around 41 million, which they would've been happy with 1 million and the mobility (how fast they swim) is at 95%, which normal is 20%. The procedure wasn't bad at all. I didn't get cramps from it. I am hoping it worked! I have to take a progesterone pill twice a day and not orally (sorry TMI but want to record everything!) for two weeks. We will find out soon if I am pregnant. I have told some people exactly when but don't want to tell everyone bc I won't be telling people til about 12 weeks if I'm pregnant so I'm not sure when I will blog about the results, just keep me in your prayers!!

Sorry if it sounds scatter-brained, trying to remember everything and it was very hard!

A Small Update and Rant

So I went to the dr on Wed and the Femara didn't work. They called me on Thurs to see if I could start letrozol (sp?) that day and take for 5 days. Then I would come in on Tues to get more tests done and if those pills didn't work I would get a shot of letrozol. Well I was pretty excited until I remembered Joshua will be out of town for about 3 weeks. Yeah so scratch that idea. I get to start my cycle over again and try next month. Oh and we have been talking about adoption. If by the time he puts on Captain and we aren't close to getting pregnant we will start the adoption process.

Ok now for my next part. A friend told me I should write about what people shouldn't say to ladies that are dealing with what I'm going through. I understand some people have said some of the things to me do not take offense!!! This is really just to get off my chest.

1. Don't tell me to not stress over it. I am trying not to and by you saying that doesn't help. It's so hard to not stress when the only thing you have ever wanted to do is be a mother!

2. Never say it will happen one day. It might and might not. You are not God, he has chosen if it will or won't and I accept that.

3. Please please please don't tell me I can have your child. I don't think it is funny. Would you want your child to know you don't want him/her? I would give anything to have any kind of moment with my own child. So think of that when you are having a "tough" day.

What you can say is that you are praying or thinking of me. That always makes me feel good.

I'm not sorry if it sounds harsh bc that is how I feel but I am sorry if you take offense even though I said you shouldn't.

Ok I am done. Have a great night!